With holidays approaching, some of us are starting to think about giving a party. Others of us are hoping to go to one (or more). Socializing is a great way to bolster good cheer and optimism. It takes us away – at least temporarily – from our laptops and screens and connects us with community.

So here are some suggestions and tips that might help with you decision… party time!

1. What type of party? Cocktail? Potluck? Dinner party? BBQ? Shower? Tea?

• Cocktail: the cocktail dinatoire is very popular and pretty easy. Basically drinks and a self-serve buffet (mainly room temperature foods).
• Potluck – economical and pleasant for people who like to join in.
• BBQ or an outdoor party – casual, stand up, weather permitting.
• Shower: baby or bridal usually has a limited number of guests.
• Tea: pleasant for some and won’t last too long.

2. Guests: who should I invite?

• Depends on the type of party – for a cocktail party, the guest list can be fairly large – say – 30 people (or less). A dinner party in your dining room? Six or 8 (depending on your space) is pretty doable.
• An outdoor party is a good way to include children – they can generally amuse themselves, run around, and sort of stay out of the way!
• Who to invite? neighbors, friends, relatives, work mates… And the guests don’t all need to know one another – it makes for more interesting encounters.
• Invite people you know and like even if they are not party givers. That doesn’t matter – some of the most interesting guests love to go to parties but don’t like to give them!

3. Food

• I do not ask guests if they have ‘allergies’ – After all, they know what they can and cannot eat – Try to have an assortment of foods so that there will be something for everyone.

4. The Bar

• For a cocktail party, have beer, wine, and some soft drink (such as sparkling water) available for self service. Set up this bar away from the food and have a bowl of nuts or potato chips available. People tend to linger at the bar and if you have the bar and the dinner together, the line gets long…
• If you do make a cocktail, folks will love that but do this for a small group – you don’t want to be mixing cocktails for too long.

5. Dress

• What you wear is, of course, dependent on where you live and the customs there – but generally, if you are the host: don’t overdress. It might make your casual guests uncomfortable.
• Likewise, if you are a guest and want to gussy up, feel free – it might give your host some pleasure.

6. Space

• When having a party with a fair number of guests, don’t worry about the size of your space. You can tell when a party really gets off the ground when everyone stands up! You don’t need a chair for everyone… (unless it’s a tea party for your grandma).
• A more recent phenomenon is mask-wearing in crowds: some of your guests may wear masks – and as with allergies, they will know why they need them. No need to question this.

7. Invitations

• Email or telephone is typical and generally works well. Unless you are having a more formal event (bridal shower for example), a written invitation isn’t really necessary.
• If you are having a group of friends, you might throw out a couple of dates and decide on the one that fits best. This is practical since so many have various working hours.
• Sending a reminder a few days in advance is a good idea – some people are slow to answer or they haven’t marked their calendars.

8. Preparation

• Decide on your menu and write a shopping list.
• Do your shopping close to the party date – you don’t need to load up your fridge a week in advance.
• Very experienced and daring cooks might decide to make a dish they have never cooked. But! for most of us? Don’t experiment. Make something that you how to do and most important, know how long it takes.
• Do any prep work and baking (if you are making a dessert) a day in advance. Finish up on the day of the party.
• BUT! An hour before the party, stop with preparations. Relax, take a shower, read the paper…. What makes guests really uncomfortable is to have the host , sweaty in a grimy apron, running around madly cooking, setting the table, grabbing glasses and so on.

9. Successful parties…

• Parties that feel relaxing and welcoming.
• The food is plentiful and appealing but not overloaded.
• Dinner parties for a small number take the most preparation (the courses, table setting, etc.) but are the most intimate and very appreciated.
• The cocktail dinatoire – earlier mentioned is a great way to entertain self serve drinks and a buffet of food gives guests plenty of choice and a light meal – or a full one depending on what one eats!